It seems that all the all the home wreckers/strippers/IHOP waitresses are crawling out from Tiger Woods’ Ambien haze and crawling under Jesse James. A fourth mistress has come forward and hired the Patron Saint of Mistresses, Gloria Allred.
Yesterday, Jesse James Mistress Count rose to 3 (click here for details and photos) and last night word spread that it is now at 4.
Radar Online has learned exclusively about the existence of Mistress Number 4 and that the as-yet unidentified woman has hired Allred, who famously represented Tiger Woods’ mistress Rachel Uchitel and others.
Gloria Allred told the media outlet:
“I represent a beautiful model and businesswoman. She had a three year intimate relationship with Jesse James. He pursued her and had strong feeling for her. She is in the process of trying to decide if she will come forward. She has proof of their relationship including hundreds of text messages, emails and photos. The relationship JUST RECENTLY ENDED after the scandal broke.”
So in case you have been living in a jungle and nursing a baby bird back to health with Twinkies and worms (true story) here is the recap on James’ Slut Parade:
1. Michelle “Bombshell” McGee – Stripper who enjoys white people, forehead tattoos and Hilter memorabilia. (CLICK HERE for her pics)
2. Melissa Smith – Another stripper. Melissa loves tattoos, unprotected sex and beating on cops and is a sucker for couch humping. (CLICK HERE for her photos)
3. Brigitte Daguerre- Not a stripper but a photographer who likes to take pictures of herself wearing nothing but bubbles and a top hat. She is also a zoo keeper of some kind as Jesse professed that he wanted to be her “monkey.” (CLICK HERE for photos of her.)
4. Secret Susan – I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that she is a clerk at Big Lots who moonlights as a stripper under the name Misstery Box.
Between Tiger and Jesse, I’m finding it a bit uncomfortable to be a member of the same gender. Please, please, no more.
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