Hulk Hogan doesn’t want to be defined by his platinum whiskers. No, he’s more than just a man with a ‘stache. That’s why he’s shaving off his iconic facial hair. Actually he’s doing it for his acting career. You know, because people will take him more seriously without it.
Hogan told TMZ “I’m getting ready to go on some auditions. I’m getting ready to shave my head and my mustache. So that should be scary…” You know who’s not happy about this. Well, everyone that was alive in the 80s. But, besides them: the American Mustache Institute. (How amazing is it that there’s an American Mustache Institute?) Chairman for the institute – and self-professed doctor of “nuclear mustacheology” (I shizz you not) – Dr. Aaron Perlut is devastated about the demise of Hogan’s facial hair.
Per TMZ:
“Not only would the removal of his lower nose foliage cause angels in heaven to die and fall to earth — as is written in biblical texts — but it would send a poor message to young people of Mustached American descent who wish to embrace the Mustached American experience. We do hope that Mr. Hogan, for whom we have great reverence, reconsiders shaving his upper lip shading device as millions of those he has inspired would be greatly let down, leading to mass chaos and deep bouts of depression in the Mustached American community.”
Uh-huh. That’s totally normal. While we still think a 58-year-old man probably should not be sporting a bleached-blonde ‘stache and bandana that hides a bald head but not the long locks spilling out from beneath it, we’re kind of sad to see his famous look go away. But we can still save Hogan’s mustache! Write or call your Congressman and demand that Hogan’s handlebar mustache be declared a national treasure. America may never recover.
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Images Via: WENN
