You are here: Home / Archives for Jessica Alba

Bradley Cooper & Eric Dane to be Gay Lovers??

July 9, 2009 By Leave a Comment

eric-danebradley-cooper

Now here is a movie that I would pay double, triple even, to see!! “Grey’s Anatomy” sexy star Eric Dane has signed on to play a Bret Farve-like quarterback in Garry Marshall’s upcoming comedy “Valentine’s Day.” Bradley Cooper is in final negotiations to also star in the movie, which is about five slightly-interconnecting stories playing out during Valentine’s Day in Los Angeles. While the summary does not mention Dane’s character to be gay, the backstory behind Coopers’s character leads you to believe that he just might be… Cooper will play a gay man whose lover is a closeted football player. The movie also stars Julia Roberts, Anne Hathaway, Jessica Alba, Jessica Biel, Jennifer Garner, and Shirley MacLaine with Ashton Kutcher said to also be in final negotiations. Kutcher would play an owner of a flower shop who proposes to his girlfriend, played by Alba, only to realize he is in love with his close friend, played by Garner, who discovers her boyfriend is married, who from the sounds of it will be played by fellow Grey’s Anatomy star Patrick Dempsey,also tapped to star in the movie, whos character is a cheating doctor. Did you follow me there?

With such a star-studded cast, this movie will definitely be a must see in my book! Only thing that would make this even better would be if they were to suddenly replace the stuck-up Jessica Alba!

Images Via: Wenn, Details

Filed Under: Anne Hathaway, Celebrity Gossip, Jennifer Garner, Jessica Alba, Jessica Biel, Movies Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Jessica Alba Defaces Oklahoma City, Apologizes

June 10, 2009 By 2 Comments

jessica-alba-vandalizing-oklahoma-1

I thought Jessica Alba’s performance in “The Love Guru” was bad enough, but it appears the actress has outdone herself in the lack of intelligence category.

It seems the actress who is currently in Oklahoma City, OK filming a movie, decided to take a Hayden Panettiere-like stand on behalf of aquatic life. In this case, she wants to save the lovable and cuddly great white sharks.

Alba photographed herself all around the city defacing multiple pieces of property by gluing huge photos of Jaws to them. Naturally, she is now being brought-up on charges.

Via TMZ:

“Oklahoma City cops tell us the city’s Director of Parks and Recreation — Wendell Whisenhunt — filed a police report after photos surfaced of Alba allegedly defacing electrical boxes, a bridge and a United Way billboard. Alba was on a mission, gluing posters that are part of a campaign to save the great whites.”

Perhaps she sniffed a little too much of the glue as she was plastering the posters around town.

Alba released the following apology this morning. Or rather, her “people”did:

“I got involved in something I should have had no part of. I realize that I should have used better judgment and I regret not thinking things through before I made a spontaneous and ill-advised decision to let myself get involved with the people behind this campaign. I sincerely apologize to the citizens of Oklahoma City and to the United Way for my involvement in this incident.”

That’s right. She defaced a United Way billboard with a poster of a man-eating shark.

Please use the comment section to complete this sentence: “Jessica Alba is as dumb as _____________.”

[Keep Clicking Thumbnails for a Larger Image]

Images Via: The Lost Ogle

Filed Under: Celebrity Crime, Celebrity Gossip, Celebrity Quotes, Jessica Alba Tagged With: , , , , , , , , ,

Love Guru Leads Razzie Nominations!

January 22, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Oh Mike Myers, how far you fall! To be leading the pack for the worst of the worst is the funniest thing about the movie, if you ask me. According to the main site, The “Love Guru” recieved seven nominations, the highlights being worst movie, and worst acting for four people: Mike Myers, Jessica Alba, Verne Troyer and Ben Kingsley. Is anyone besides myself, thinking of the good old days when Myers was on “Saturday Night Live” or starring in Wayne’s World? *sigh*

As for other nominations, it shouldn’t be shocking that “The Happening” scored some nominations–worst movie and worst acting for Mark Wahlberg. I mean, how good can a movie be when the plants start to attack? I mean come on! M. Night Shyamalan, where has your talent gone? Did you spend it all on the “Sixth Sense“??

And as per usual form, the Razzies are going to be handed out the day before the Oscars, on February 21st. I have already started to pick out my dress, I think I can wear it to both ceremonies, no?

Filed Under: Awards, Celebrity Gossip, Jessica Alba, Movies, Saturday Night Live Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Jessica Alba Photoshop – Before and After Photos

December 8, 2008 By 14 Comments

A few days ago everyone was all gushy over Jessica Alba’s Campari ads. (Personally, I have been more excited about a trip to the gyno. Big deal. It‘s a Latina version of Brooke Hogan celebrating booze.)

Alba was praised for looking so spectacular post baby. I would too if a team of skilled artists took off 20 pounds. She was airbrushed into something more “acceptable” with the addition of extra collar bones and knee definition. They also slimmed her down, removing all of her curves and performing a photoshopped breast lift.

I need a couple of those. She isn’t the only celeb to go under the photoshop knife. David Beckham was said to have his manhood enhanced for his Armani ads. (Click HERE to see David Beckham’s Photoshopped Bulge in Armani Ads.)

[Click Thumbnails for a Larger Image]

Filed Under: Brooke Hogan, Celebrity Gossip, Jessica Alba, Magazines Tagged With: , , ,

Jessica Alba Snubs Little Boy

November 18, 2008 By 2 Comments

I am not a fan of Jessica Alba. I wish her the best of luck in the world, but if she fell down a flight of stairs landed in napalm and became deaf and blind from said tumble….I would laugh hysterically.

A Perez Hilton reader sent in a story about Jessica Alba’s heartlessness and snobbery. She wrote in about her personal experience with the “actress.”

Hi Perez…

I emailed you last week that a movie that Jessica Alba was starring in was being filmed on the street where I live, in Staten Island, one of the 4 boroughs of NYC. The town where I live is considered upper middle class, very residential. Well, I happened to see her right near my house, so I took my 8 year old nephew to see her (he is a big fan of Fantastic 4). I brought my camera with me and went over to her and asked if he could have a picture with her. She looked at me, looked down at my nephew and turned away from us. She then said, No, I do not allow my photo taken. Needless to say my nephew was heartbroken.

I wanted to rip her hair our of her head and knock her teeth down her throat. How can these people disappoint children the way they do? She should be ashamed of herself. How disgusting.

I would like write her an open letter in return.

Dear Ms. Alba,

I know you are bitter about your thighs and the fact that you recently gave birth to someone way prettier than you, but calm the funk down. I too find children annoying, but I also remember that one day they will be the ones changing my diaper in a nursing home.

So in conclusion I hope you find it in your peanut sized heart to pull the broom stick out of your rump and do a 4 year old a favor and take 30 seconds to give him a picture.

Signed,

Mankind

P.S. Ever think about a career change? Acting isn’t your forte. Just a thought.

Filed Under: Celebrity Crime, Celebrity Gossip, Jessica Alba, Movies, WTF?!? Tagged With:

Jessica Alba Quitting Hollywood !!?!

November 17, 2008 By 1 Comment

Let the angels rejoice and the a ray come down from the parting clouds of heaven! Jessica Alba wants to quit her day job of force feeding us her crap acting and be a full time mother.

“To be honest with you, it’s tough – and if it was any other movie [An Invisible Sign Of My Own] I wouldn’t be doing it. It’s difficult to spend any time away from her. I love my daughter and she’s going to be with me every day on the set.”

I doubt she will give up her bread and butter. You can’t live on “Dark Angel” money forever. Someone’s gotta keep her supplied with scarves (Seriously…you live in L.A. and we get it…you are a tortured artist) and fully stock her horrid shoe collection. I’m sorry to say…she will probaby NEVER go away.

Image Via: WENN

Filed Under: Celebrity Babies, Jessica Alba, Television, WTF?!? Tagged With: ,
Newer Posts »