Brad Pitt Finally Thinks Marrying Angelina Jolie is a Good Idea

First comes love then comes marriage then comes Jolie with a baby carriage… Wait, they weren’t married when they had all those kids, but Brad Pitt says it’s probably about time he marry Angelina Jolie. Originally, the two said they weren’t going to marry until gay marriage was legal, but now that the kids are older they are asking questions like “mom and dad when’s the big day?”

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Angelina Jolie Starving Herself ?!

Angelina Jolie likes to keep her body pretty lean, but according to sources close to her, starving herself has more to do with her humanitarian efforts than how she looks – it’s to show her respect for ‘the poor’, not because she likes looking skinny.

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Angelina Jolie Living on 800 Calories a Day ?!

Good ol’ Star magazine is shilling a story that Angelina Jolie is barely living on 800 calories a day. (How many calories are in holy water and kale?)

Their report also insists that friends of Jolie are worried and she is even headed to rehab to deal with her weight issues. National Enquirer adds an Angelina Jolie scary skinny story with a rumored addiction to diet pills.

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Angelina Jolie Having An Affair with Her Bodyguard – RUMOR

Star Magazine has once again appeared to have pulled ‘news’ out of their rear and is claiming that her holiness – Angelina Jolie - is stepping out on Brad Pitt and getting a little too close for comfort to her current bodyguard. Known only as ‘Guy,’ he’s been by her side for months and she jets all over Europe for her directorial debut ‘In the Land of Blood and Honey’, as well as Pitt’s ‘World War Z.’

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Brad Pitt Offers Jennifer Aniston $1 Million for Angelina Jolie Photo

I bet that title made this scroll through your head: LOL, WHUT?! It should because I was thisclose to writing a story about a cross-eyed possum due to the fact I found it equally as interesting. I digress, lets explore the latest In Touch Brangelina story…

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Jennifer Aniston Brangelina-Palooza

Brad Pitt dared to utter a reference to Jennifer Aniston in an interview for Parade magazine. Basically he allegedly alluded to the fact that being married to Jen is as exciting as steamed broccoli. Since Brad opened his beard-hole he has had to backtrack and slap a plethora of I didn’t mean it like that statements.

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Brad Pitt Casts Maddox in ‘Battling Boys’

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s son Maddox is gonna become a star in his own right! Maddox is reported to be taking the lead role in upcoming movie “Battling Boys,” produced by Pitt’s Plan B company. The film is based on a graphic novel about the young son of a god who leaves his mountain-top home “to fight monsters.”

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Jennifer Aniston Kicked Brad Pitt Out

A new book by Arnon Milchan reveals that Jennifer Aniston told Brad Pitt to pack up and get out of their home after he confessed that he was in love with Angelina Jolie. Jolie has emphatically denied that she became involved with Pitt while she was co-starring with him in “Mr. & Mrs. Smith,” but book quotes from Milchan not only confirm that the two did hook up during filming, but that Aniston immediately threw him out of their home when she learned of the affair. Can you blame her?

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Emma Stone: Natural Blonde, Mom Got Drunk with Brangelina

Emma Stone was on ‘Conan’ and discussed many key current event topics like her natural hair color and her mother getting drunk with Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie.

The ‘Crazy, Stupid, Love’ star admitted that she is a natural blonde but went red for a film. Judd Apatow is responsible for her love of the ginger hair hue. He had her dye it and she found that she felt “funnier” after ditching her blonde locks.

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Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie to Marry

This is pretty much the 875 claim that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are getting married. It’s been a bit of a slow gossip week and Us is going with the ol’ standby of Brangelina cover. When they spun the wheel this week it breezed past break up, Angie snorting coke out of Lord Voldemort’s navel, Brad sending Jennifer Aniston I MISS YOU smoke signals and landed on wedding.

A whopping 3 sources (hobo paid in chicken, drunk girl stumbling out of the club and their former pool boy’s best friend’s cousin – the holy trinity of sources) told the mag that they are finally succumbing to the demands of their children and getting married.

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