The Warlock of Crazy Turned Traveling Freak Show of Cokehead Shenanigans is continuing to anger Warner Brothers. He has been flapping his vodka hole and shilling stories about returning to ‘Two and a Half Men’ and the network wanting him back. WB is calling Charlie Sheen a liar, liar crotch on fire.

They have sent him and his attorney a letter demanding his stop making accusations that he is in talks to return to the show. CBS and Warner Brothers are trying to distance themselves from Sheen and his vortex of nuttery. TMZ shared a portion of the letter…

“Those statements are false. As you know, there have been no discussions, there are no discussions and there will be no discussions, regarding his returning to or having any involvement with the series.”

However, Charlie adamantly stated to 98.5 Sports Hub radio show that there is an “85% chance” he will return to “Two and a Half Men.” This was shortly after his second failed show in Radio City.

It looks like hell has a better chance of being dominated by snow princesses, kittens and rainbows. Sheen’s lawyer attempted to clear things up, but failed to make his client look any better. According to Marty Singer, there were discussion between WB, Charlie and CBS. What Charlie concocted as an offer to return to the show, was actually a meeting about finalizing contracts and making sure he was paid in full before the WB slammed the door on his torpedoes of revolting hooker humping stories.

So Charlie didn’t lie about the actual discussions, he lied about what they were about. Yeah, that is WAY better.