Jessica Simpson Returns to Reality TV

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Jessica Simpson is returning to do what she does best… Reality TV. VH1′s “The Price of Beauty” will take Simpson all over the world in search of what people find beautiful and why in all sorts of different cultures. Part of Jessicas’ job will be to study local fashions, dietary fads and beauty regimes of local women, even participating in some of the extreme practices she discovers. Simpson said she was immediately intrigued by the concept of doing a show about true beauty.

Per Us:

“I have always believed that beauty comes from within and confidence will always make a woman beautiful, but I know how much pressure some women put on themselves to look perfect,” she said in a statement Monday.

“I am really looking forward to discovering how beauty is perceived in different cultures and participating in some of the crazy things people do to feel beautiful,” she continued. “I know we will all learn a lot on this journey and I am so excited that VH1 is coming along on what I’m sure will be a wild ride.”

Wild ride indeed. This should be quite the learning adventure for the girl who once couldn’t distinguish between tuna and chicken. Simpson has come under fire from the media and magazines for her appearance lately, starting when she appeared onstage wearing unflattering high-waisted jeans back in January (read about that here.)

Shooting for the new series begins in mid-july, with a premiere date scheduled for early 2010. Jessica and her creepy father Joe will serve as executive producers. Hopefully this show will be a lot more successful than her previous one on MTV with ex husband Nick Lachey called “Newlyweds“. Either way, with Jessica Simpson involved it ought to be entertaining.

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Images Via: Webster is My Bitch

Oprah’s KFC Pimping Goes Very Wrong

As I reportedly earlier the great and all powerful Oprah has brought forth free poultry unto the world. Free KFC coupons are causing riots in some parts of the chicken crazy country. Several people have come forward ready to cut Opie because the snobs at the joint are refusing to accept the coupons.

Per Gawker:

I just returned from my lunch break hoping to use the attached coupon
to score some free KFC grilled chicken at the mid town location 47 E.
42nd Street. Well I guess around 200 people also had the same idea
with coupons in hand.

When I finally gave up (after 30 minutes of aguing with other
customers) a small RIOT started going on outside the store with people
screaming at the manager while he wont let them use their free KFC
coupons (issued by OPRAH)

Another person shared a story as another manager was chased down the street by a lynch mob wanting their chicken.

I went over to our nearest KFC a few minutes ago (this was around 42nd and Park)and chaos ensued. Despite the very visible grilled chicken behind the register, the manager told everyone with coupons to leave and that the promotion was over for the day. The people there are currently holding a sit-in and refusing to leave until they get their free chicken…or the cops are called. Racial epithets were being spewed, people who actually wanted to pay for chicken were facing a potential beatdown, and the manager ran from the screaming horde. Oprah, what have ye wrought?

I hate to laugh hysterically at people threatening to bust out straight razors on managers with a superiority complex at KFC…..wait. No I don’t. Bwhahahaa!

Miley Cyrus’ Uvula Attacked by Chicken – Video

It’s not as dirty as it sounds. I swear. A uvula is ‘the small, fleshy mass of tissue hanging in the back of your throat.’ For those of you who are “Full House” fans, it is your “hangy ball of courage.”

Miley Cyrus says she cut her uvula on a piece of chicken. I can just picture tweens everywhere plotting a war on poultry. She announced via her blog that she sounds even more like a 40 year old smoker or Marge Simpson.

“The reason I sound like this is because I cut my uvula. The way the nurse explained it to me is, you know that cartoon when that really obnoxious baby screams and you see that waggling thing around in their mouth? That’s a uvula. So I cut my uvula today on a piece of chicken. I put too much dressing on it and it got slippery and it got caught and it cut my uvula.”

Before you go all rogue on KFC, Miley will return to her normal before you can say money making machine.