Jodie Foster Attacked Underage Fan – Police Report PIC

Apparently, if Mariah Carey and Naomi Campbell had a lovechild it would be Jodie Foster. Radar is reporting that the “Panic Room” star left visible bruises and scratches on a 17 year old fan who took her picture. The boy and his girlfriend were eating at The Grove when they caught sight of Jodie with her two sons. He started snapping away with his camera and she got a case of the angries.

According to the police report filed by the boy:

“Vict while at The Grove saw susp and began to take pics of susp with his camera then walked to the valet area of The Grove. Susp followed vict, poked him on his chest, grabbed vict by his left arm causing visible injury.”

The father of the alleged victim told RadarOnline.com exclusively: “My son was at The Grove with his girlfriend and they were going to see a movie. He saw Jodie Foster and is a big fan so went over and took a picture of her.

“She came after him, poked him in the chest and said, ‘Do you even have a mother you slime ball?’”

The family said that their son was really confused and apologized profusely to the actress. “He didn’t mouth back at all and was scared of her,” the father said.

“At one point Jodie’s son even came over to my son and apologized. Her kids were really embarrassed.”

Foster is intensely private about her personal life, especially when it comes to questions about her sexuality. She has two biological sons, Charles, 11, and Christopher, 8, but has never revealed the identity of their fathers.

The family of the alleged victim later went to police who filled out an incident report. Police did not respond at the scene. Because of that the incident report can be a “he said, she said” type of document. Foster’s first name is spelled wrong and her age is incorrect on the document. That information would be supplied by the alleged victim.

But the alleged victim’s father not only insists his was victimized, he’s furious. “On top of it all, he’s a minor! My wife is furious that while Jodie was trying to protect her children, she wasn’t there to protect her son.

“This left a really bad impression on my son about her. He used to be a big fan and now he has a bad taste in his mouth. He’s a good kid; kind of small for his age. There was no threat to Jodie.”

This kid is trying to way too hard to make himself sound innocent. “He is small for his age…he was a huge Jodie Foster fan….” I am not buying it. More to the point…what 17 year old boy is “huge Jodie Foster fan”?????? How many teenage midgets with Foster fetish are out there? His story needs Febreezed because it smells like a pile of crap. You know people don’t use the insult “slime ball” anymore. Jodie is a closeted butch and would probably hurl insults that you would need to Google and decipher with Urban Dictionary.

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Images Via: WENN.com

January Jones Hit and Run, Plus HICKEY PHOTOS: BOBBY FLAY UPDATE

The blonde chic from “Mad Men” pulled some hit and run hood rat shiz last night. January Jones hit three parked cars and then exited stage left while mumbling about not being able to deal…

LAPD tells TMZ January was driving a Range Rover around 9 PM last night when she allegedly lost control, hit the other cars and caused some major damage. We’re told a witness reported the accident to police and claimed that January fled on foot after saying, “I can’t deal with this commotion.”

Eventually she went back and Jones’ excuse for exiting Dynasty style was paparazzi following her. The cops bought that crap and didn’t arrest her, but they are investigating. No alcohol or drugs were involved according to the police, but they didn’t bother to test her either.

I find her to be as interesting as a plastic bag in the wind, but the paps were all over her after they caught her doing a “cab ride of shame” the day before. (C-List stars don’t do walks of shame.) She hit some GQ/Oceana soiree and then hit an after party. The following morning she got into a cab with her hair a mess, strapless bra hanging out and looking like she had slept a cumulative 20 minutes. Don’t pretend you haven’t had to pick bits of Dortios from your hair, take a whores bath in a frat bathroom and walk home.

She was also was photographed sporting a hickey as she was leaving another party in Malibu in late May. Maybe I underestimated what kind of ho shiz this girl is capable of…

UPDATE: Apparently Bobby Flay was also on the scene of the accident. Jones called him after she got into the accident. He showed up to see if she was ok. This is crap story his publicist cooked up:

Baum says Flay only met Jones once, and gave her his number because she said she wants to remodel her kitchen.

After crashing her car, Jones called Flay for help and Baum says he went to the scene to see if she was OK.”

Yes, this story needs Febreezed as it too smells fishy.

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Images Via: WENN.com, Wireimage

Charges Filed Against Balloon Boy Crazy Parents

Richard Henne, father of Balloon Boy and future Michael Lohan, could face up to 6 years in jail and up to $500,000 in jail for making me miss watching Thor at the gym to report on his helium adventure. (Click here for the story of the Balloon Boy Hoax).

Sheriff Jim Alderden of Fort Collins, CO announced today that the Heene Ballon Boy nuttery has been officially deemed a hoax by the police. Charges are going to be filed and include: conspiracy, calling in a fake emergency and contributing to the delinquency of a minor. Alderden talked about how the Heene family are actors with a degree in tomfoolery and are super sorry they fell for the hoax.

He then used strategery after the Larry King interview (in which the tot happily told the world “it was for the show” click here to see that) to get them to admit the wasted everyone’s time in watching a flipping balloon for hours and chanting to the helium gods for his safe return. While he couldn’t outright confirm “batch is craaaaaazy” and lied, he did confirm the investigation is well under way and they are building evidence to file the charges ASAP.

“We were looking at Class 3 misdemeanor, which hardly seems serious enough given the circumstances. We are talking to the district attorney, federal officials to see if perhaps there aren’t additional federal charges that are appropriate in this circumstance.”

They need to add booty blocking to that list of charges and make it punishable by death due to the hotness level of my gym candy I missed out on.

Dr.Phil Strikes Again, More Tales of the Boobie Grabber

drphil-grabs-a-boob

I know, I know kittens. The news is dry this morning and I have resorted hammering on Dr. Phil who is like that creepy Uncle you try and avoid at holidays. Oprah’s boo turned Diet Coke version of Jerry Springer is being sued for his boobie grabbing.

TMZ reports that a woman by the name Shirley Dieu filed a suit in L.A. Count Superior Court that alleges brainwashing, physical, emotional abuse and forced nudity. She was seeking therapy from Dr. Phil in 2007 and has now come forward to seek justice.

“In the documents, Shirley claims Phil forced her to “be in the same room with a completely naked live man while he exposed his entire naked body, genitals and all.” Shirley alleges she tried to escape the building, but “was blocked by the staff to prevent her from leaving.”

[She] also claims Phil “touched her left breast during her therapy session.” Shirley also claims Phil lied to her about being a “real” doctor — alleging that the TV shrink “is not licensed to practice in the state of California.”

This guy is like the Megan Fox of the psychiatry world…no talent and only famous because someone plucked him out obscurity. So in summary Dr. Phil is a boob burglar and Michael Bay = Oprah.

Images Via: wenn.com

Tila Tequila Dead – Twitter Hacking Photo

Some sick person broke into Tila Tequila’s home. Her stalker had thrown her dog into the trunk of her car and got onto Tequila’s Twitter page. Said stalker then announced that he/she had killed the VH1 reality show wonder. The stalker wrote on her page:

“I just broke into her house, killed her and her dog. Logged onto Twitter to tell you guys. She was signed on already. Tila Tequila is dead.”

Fear not. Tila is alive and well. After worried fans began freaking out she reportedly went on to clear the Twitter air around 4:10 this morning.

“Pt1 This is Tila. I am deeply sorry for the earlier post about me being dead. I don’t know who logged into my account and wrote that.”

“but someone did indeed break into my house. It’s been a very scary night for me. it’s 4:10am now and have been dealing with it all.”

“too much has happened. I am scared, exhausted and drained but I am ok! Want to apologize to my fans who were worried about me”

“Im moving into a different house very soon because I have a stalker who is very much so endangering my life at the moment….I love u all. They Broke everything in my living room….EVERYTHING IS SHATTERED! I’m so sad right now….this sucks.” Then I found my dog locked in the trunk of my car!!!!!!!!!! I’ve been crying all night. THis is f****d up. I’m sad and shocked and bye”

Reps refuse to comment on this craziness. Tila also faced a rumored death last year after her Myspace page claimed she died from a drug overdose.

Image Via: Tila Tequila’s Twitter

Keira Knightley Beaten by Boyfriend in Domestic Violence Ad – Video

Keira Knightley is seen being beaten by her boyfriends in an ad to raise awareness for domestic violence. The 2 minute commercial shows Keira coming home to an angry and jealous boyfriend who hits, kicks and slaps her. The actress took part in the ad directed by her “Atonement” pal Joe Wright for the charity, Women’s Aid.

Us Magazine Quotes Knightley:

“While domestic violence exists in every section of society we rarely hear about it. Domestic violence affects one in four women at some point in their lifetime and kills two women every week.”

This ad coincidentally comes on the heals of the Rihanna and Chris Brown saga. The pop princess was beaten by her boyfriend and left in a bloody mess after a fight in Brown’s car erupted. RiRi is just one of many stars to suffer domestic abuse. Robin Givens suffered at the hands of Mike Tyson. Tina Turner took years of abuse from her husband, Ike. Sharon Osbourne was beaten by her own father several times. Whitney Houston also claims her husband, Bobby Brown, hit her on several occasions.

Keira’s ad will air in theaters starting April 6th.

Adnan Ghalib to be Deported to Afghanistan

Britney Spears’ parasite may finally be someone else’s problem. Bust out the champagne and nacho buffet in celebration.

After hitting a court official with his car and facing several charges, Adnan Ghalib may be thrown in jail or even deported. He might be shipped back to Afghanistan if he is found guilty and the judge orders the deportation punishment. He is facing charges that include assault with a deadly weapon, hit-and-run and battery.

It is up in the air as to his official legal papers state his native country is listed as. He was born in raised in Afghanistan until moving to Birmingham at the age of 5. He is legally aloud to work in the United States.

Via Daily Mail:

‘The country of citizenship listed on the legal files is where someone convicted of a serious crime will be deported to whether they hold a green card or not,’ a source from the Los Angeles police told People News. ‘There is some confusion on his court documents over where he comes from. Some list the country as Afghanistan, but another states his nationality as British.’

We will find out on April 2nd when he is due in court for a hearing. Let’s hope he gets flushed back to whatever toilet he crawled out of.

Images Via: Wenn

Chris Brown Hit Rihanna – Fight Details CONFIRMED

Rumors are continuing to run amok of the incident that led to Chris Brown’s arrest and mysteriously emergency rumor stop for his girlfriend, Rihanna.

Above is a video of RiRi’s car at Cedars Sinai Hospital’s emergency wing. Police responded to a 911 call in which an “unnamed woman” reported that Chris Brown had assaulted her. Oddly enough Rihanna canceled her appearance at the Grammy Awards and reports that she is currently sporting bruises and injuries have surfaced, along with the logical assumption Brown hit her.

Sources have now come forward after Chris’ official arrest. Attorney Mark Geragos drove him to the police. Where he turned himself in. (You might remember Geragos from the Laci Peterson case. He was the douche bag attorney for Scott Peterson.)

It was around 12:30 AM on Sunday morning. The sources said that after a Pre-Grammy party the got into an argument and he got physical and hit Rihanna. More than once.

Via NY Daily News:

“She got out of the car to walk home. He got out to stop her,” said a source. “Things got physical. He hit her, possibly more than once. She had multiple bruises.”

“They were arguing. Apparently, Rihanna accused him of checking out other women at Clive Davis’ party,” said the industry insider.

“It seems she’s taking the steps you’d need to take if you were going to press charges,” added the source. “But she could wake up tomorrow morning and decide she still loves him.”

The LAPD Confirmed:

“Brown and the woman were inside of a vehicle,” said LAPD spokeswoman April Harding. “According to the victim they became involved in an argument. … The argument escalated into an altercation.”

He has already made bail and been released. Reps for the “Disturbia” singer merely stated that she is “fine, thanks.”

UPDATE: TMZ has confirmed it was Rihanna. Chris Brown was arrested for assault against his girlfriend.

Law enforcement sources tell us the crime report calls the incident assault with a deadly weapon — we do not yet know the nature of the weapon.

The crime report gives the victim’s name as Robyn Fenty — that’s Rihanna’s real name.

The rumor mill is also convinced that Brown beat the tar out of Rihanna because she gave him herpes. The singer was spotted with a recent outbreak and sores on her lip shortly after the New Year. (See that Rihanna Herpes Photo and Story HERE.) I doubt this, but I think it is more likely due to her jealous ways.

Chris Brown Jailed for Battery, Rihanna Cancels Grammy Appearance

Singer Chris Brown is being investigated for an assault claim. The LAPD is all over Brown as an unidentified woman called 911 and had “visible injuries.” The mystery woman and Chris were arguing inside a car in the early hours of Sunday morning. She has claimed thing became violent. After the call to authorities was made he fled the scene by the time police got there according to TMZ.

Currently the cops are hunting Brown down to “talk” with him regarding the incident. Meanwhile, girlfriend Rihanna is no longer going to perform at the 2009 Grammy Awards. She won’t even be attending the event according to Grammy officials. Oddly enough, The Insider is reporting Rihanna is sporting a “slightly bruised” face. Hmm…. She attended the Pre-Grammy party on February 6th and no (if The Insider is correct) she has a bruised face. So logic would point the finger Rihanna being said beaten woman who is remaining protect by police.

What this could mean for Chris Brown depends on many factors. I will update as the story unfolds.

UPDATE: Rumors are swirling that Chris Brown beat Rihanna. The word is that they got into an argument. Rihanna is sporting bruises that are being claimed to be from a “car accident.” I’d like to remind you that this is all rumor at this point.

UPDATE 2: Brown has been arrested and booked. He made bail, which was set at 50K, last night. According to TMZ he hired attorney Mark Geragos. (He represented Scott Peterson.)

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Images Via: Wenn

Britney Spears Fights Sam Lufti, Adnan Ghalib

The former duo that dragged down Britney is back. A restraining order has been put in place to protect the Spears goodie package again.

Conservators for Britney Spears have gotten another restraining order against Sam Lutfi, Adnan Ghalib and Jon Eardley. All three men were apart of her inner circle while she was hitting rock bottom. Sam was her manager, Adnan was the leeching paparazzi gold digging boyfriend and Jon is the super shady attorney on side of Lufti. Recently Sam has been trying to weasel his way back into the Spears family. He was kicked off his leeching from Britney after her father took conservation over his daughter and managed to bring her back to the surface. Both Ghalib and Lufti were forbidden from contact with the pop princess.

After her comeback from the dismal “Blackout” days, the Britney machine is back in motion. Her former clique wants back on that train.

TMZ reports:

“One of the lawyers in the case filed a declaration saying over the past month she received “multiple telephone calls and text messages from Lutfi.” She says Lutfi wanted to set up an urgent meeting to “speak with Mr. Spears and me with regard to what he claimed was ‘information he had received about Mr. Spears and his daughter, Britney Spears as well as others.’” The attorney also says Lutfi claimed “he had been talking with Adnan Ghalib about the conservatorship and Ms. Spears’ status as a conservatee.”

In another document, one of the conservatorship lawyers claims “Mr. Lutfi has sent text messages and instant messages that contain false and hurtful allegations concerning Mr. Spears, Ms. Spears, and the Spears family.” The lawyer continues, “Mr. Lutfi, Adnan Ghalib, and Jon Eardley sought unsuccessfully to induce an attorney to file” false statements with the court.”

But this isn’t all unprovoked. It is also rumored that Britney has been voluntarily talking with Adnan and tipping him as to where she will be next. He then gets his paparazzi lackeys to show up at her destination.

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Images Via: Wenn, Fame Pictures