Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel Engaged – CONFIRMED

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are engaged. I know you were lying awake at night unable to sleep with the mystery of it.

JT and Unbuttered Toast Biel dated, broke up because he was allegedly having sexy times with a bunch of hoes, then had more alleged sexy times with Mila Kunis, Olivia Munn, Olivia Wilde and Amanda Seyfried before reuniting with Jess over pork tacos in Canada and have now decide to get married. True story.

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Ryan Phillippe Admits Alexis Knapp’s Baby Might Be His

Ryan Phillippe loves two things…the reflection of the gorgeous creature he sees in the mirror and the ladies. Basically he is a Gerard Butler/John Mayer in training. So it was hardly surprising that he might have an illegitimate baby out there.

Alexis Knapp and Ryan dated in a non-committal fashion (translation: they humped occasionally) before he decided to “get serious” and started dating Amanda Seyfried in October (translation: Amanda was more press worthy). Enter Knapp with a pregnancy and some “friends” squealing to People mag that Phillippe is the dad. The baby is due in June so simple math reasons that she became pregnant in late September/early October depending on her exact due date.

Momma Phillippe is 100% sure it’s not Ryan’s and told Radar “it can’t be true.”

“I don’t think Alexis has been around for a long time. I don’t think it can be true. He’s been dating someone else since October. If she is pregnant I’m sure it’s not my son’s. Good luck to her.”

Friends and other source-types claim that Knapp and Phillippe were serious, but he dumped her for Amanda. I am guessing that it was a one sided committed relationship. Either way, the “The Lincoln Lawyer” star admitted that he will be taking a paternity test but wants to wait until after the baby is born to avoid risks of miscarriage. Sources spilled to TMZ that Ryan admitted that it might be his baby and will “gladly” take a DNA test.

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Taylor Swift Slams John Mayer in New Song

Taylor Swift is like a basket full of kittens and it baffles me as to why Robo-Douchebags like Kanye West and John Mayer feel the need to make her cry. It also baffles me as to why T. Squints would let Mayer play with her My Little Pony palace in the first place, but a new song from her latest album, ‘Speak Now,’ is reportedly directed at John.

“They’re all made very clear,” Swift said about her penchant for taking revenge via song. “Every single song is like a roadmap to what that relationship stood for, with little markers that maybe everyone won’t know, but there are things that were little nuances of the relationship, little hints. And every single song is like that. Everyone will know, so I don’t really have to send out emails on this one.”

In the song, “Dear John” she laments about an older man taking advantage of her 19 year old innocence. Swift and Mayer were rumored to be dating while working on a duet together. Taylor didn’t believe that John’s face belongs on a box of Summer’s Eve and let him break her little glitter covered heart .

“Dear John/I see it all now that you’re gone/Don’t you think I was too young/To be messed with/The girl in the dress/Cried the whole way home/I should’ve known.” A second version of the chorus includes the lines: “It was wrong/Don’t you think nineteen’s too young/To be played/By your dark, twisted games/When I loved you so.

“My mother accused me of losing my mind/But I swore I was fine/You’ll add my name to your long list of traitors who don’t understand/And I’ll look back in regret I ignored what they said/’Run as fast as you can’.”

I side with Taylor, but gurl…you have got to grow thicker skin and let your lady version of testicular fortitude drop. The adorable innocence thing isn’t cute past the age of 20.

Click HERE to listen to Swift’s new song, “Mean.”

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Chace Crawford Lost His Virginity to Shauna Sand

Gossip Girl’s’ residential eye candy, Chace Crawford, is the subject of a deflowering story that will forever ruin any fantasies you may harbor.

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Shauna Sand claims to have taken the virginity of Chace Crawford and dated him briefly after meeting at a college party. She went and blabbed the story to Star mag giving details of their relationship. The then 18 year old Crawford caught the eye of Sand (she was 32 at the time) and her lucite themed ho stroll.

“He was so incredibly beautiful — I immediately fell in love with him! I even gave him a key to my apartment,” Shauna said.

I can just picture Pretty Pretty Princess walking up to Sand uttering those words that made her fall in love with him…..“Would you like me to hold your beer bong my lady?” It gets better one of Chace’s friends added to the tale of star crossed love.

“Chace told me, ‘Shauna was the first girl I ever had sex with! She blew my mind, and I’ll never forget it!’”

Their short lived romance ended as they drifted apart and Shauna moved on to the next helpless virgin. She further claims that they reheated their sexy times in 2007 after she divorced her second husband.

I am dipping my mind’s eye in Tilex. What respectable 32 year old woman is hitting college parties and nailing 18 year old teenagers? (Notice I used the word respectable so you can’t call me a hypocrite.) Sand also detailed their “wild sex” stories and I think I got herpes just from reading about it. Now if you will excuse me I need to hop on the good food and hit the free clinic.

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Images Via: WENN.com

Miley Cyrus Double Dates With Justin Timerblake

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In recent months, Miley Cyrus has jumped from Justin Gaston to Nick Jonas, then over to “The Last Song” co-star Liam Hemsworth, and now most recently over to Carter Jenkins who she dated prior to Gaston. Did you get all that? Now the 16 year old super star and her latest boy toy had a great time out the other night, double dating to a “Kings of Leon” concert with Justin Timberlake and girlfriend Jessica Biel. Aren’t they a little too old to be double dating with teenagers? And whats with all the celebrities making “Kings of Leon” date nights lately?

The double-daters enjoyed the concert together from the sound booth before proceeding to go backstage after the show for a VIP party. Carter and Cyrus appeared to have a good time, taking to their personal Twitter’s to tweet about the night together shortly after.

Per Twitter:

“KOL killed it. Awesome show & very fun night with MiCy @mileycyrus”

Per Twitter:

Just saw fellow Nashville natives Kings of Leon in concert wiff @carterjenkins

I cannot for the life of me understand what Cyrus and Timberlake have in common other than rehashing their Disney days together. Don’t get too attached Carter. Miley has more flavor of the months than Baskin Robbins.

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Images Via: wenn.com

Bradley Cooper Screws Jennifer Aniston

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Well, at least not in the way that she wishes!

Reportedly, Jennifer Aniston feels rejected and upset after Bradley Cooper ditched her for Renee Zellweger, and is left feeling upset. Wait, were these two ever really dating? Last I heard both Cooper and Aniston played the “Just Friends” card.

Per Us:

“She wanted to turn her date with Cooper into something…she honestly feels screwed over,” a pal tells Us of Aniston. “She had a major crush on him and she let him know. He didn’t reciprocate. She is fine. She’s used to being single and in work mode, and she’s used to rejection.”

Despite Cooper’s rejection, her friend insists that Aniston will eventually bounce back. But the pal goes on to say that Aniston doesn’t see what Renee has that she doesn’t. And quite frankly, so do I! Pals of Renee Zellweger claim they know why Cooper fell for her, citing her lack of drama and clinginess as main reasons.

Per Us:

“She just does her thing, has her friends and her life and is cool. She’s really happy and doesn’t need anyone to feel complete,” says one. Adds another: “She’ll show up wearing a sexy dress and Louboutins, but will still order a beer and rattle off the dirty jokes.”

This might not be such a bad thing for Jennifer. Jennifer Aniston needs a strong man to be with her, not a frat boy gone wild. We’ll see how long it really lasts with Renee, now that this star has a little bit of a playboy reputation. Embrace being single Jennifer!

Photo Via: US Weekly

Weekend Of The Cougars

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Wow, this weekend sure seemed to take quite the interesting turn in date choices!! Almost guaranteed to be done just for publicity, John Mayer and friend Rob Dyrdek double dated this weekend. The bff’s paid a visit to Hollywood club MyHouse over the weekend wearing two matching accessories; Monogrammed velvet smoking jackets and a date on their arms old enough to be their mothers. Meow! John must have a thing for older women, which would explain his relationship with Jennifer Aniston. As for Dyrdek, well… Its probably just another attempt to drum up some publicity, like when he appeared to have stumbled out of the same nightclub back in June and looked to be held up by Mayer and another gentleman. When the two celebrities got into their vehicle, they both started laughing. Whatever the reason is behind their latest shenanigans, its still pretty hilarious!

However, the award for the “WTF moment” of the weekend has to go to 48 year old Kathy Griffin. How genius of her was it to show up at the “Teen Choice Awards” with 19 year old Levi Johnston as her date? Can you imagine how bad Sarah Palin is flipping out right about now? But don’t start shaking your head wondering when pigs grew wings to fly over the weekend… Given the comment he made during a pre-show interview, this too is almost guaranteed to be another publicity stunt.

Per PopWatch:

Asked by an E! reporter, Johnston said, “I just, you know, look at her, shut up and do what I’m told.”

Hmmm… Shouldn’t be too hard. I mean, he did live with the Palin’s afterall. He’s used to following orders! This matchup was was really funny & clever of Griffin, and hopefully even funnier if this somehow turns into a Kathy Griffin/Sarah Palin feud. Kudos to Griffin though, cause Levi is quite the hottie!

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Image Via: wenn.com