~Well, this certainly has been the most incredible pregnancy ever! Bellies growing and shrinking! Breasts swelling and flattening! Prosthetics flopping and popping!
Frankly, all this trickery is exhausting, and hasn’t been nearly as convincing as she hoped it would be. Therefore, Floppy will be keeping a low profile for the next month. So, she’s not really pregnant, but there will be a baby soon. And Floppy has been very busy behind the scenes shaking that baby money tree! Some money is going out (payments to medical professionals who will swear that they were there for the birth), but much, much more money will be coming in.
She will be making money off of the fake story of the baby’s birth (which will be a C-section for Real Mommy but a “vaginal” delivery for Floppy). And more money off of the baby photos. And the story of how important it is to her that she “breast-feeds” her baby. And the story of how she lost the “baby weight”. And the photos of her “new” body (with no stretch marks!) achieved with grueling workouts and healthy eating. And more stories about how amazingly fast she got back into shape and got back to work. What an incredible woman! Hey, there’s serious money to be made off of this baby, and you can be sure that Floppy will “milk” it for all it’s worth. [Blind Gossip]
My Guess: It’s beyond obvious it’s Beyonce.
