This one hardly needs explaining, but Joe Jonas stopped to play with a penis. It’s unfair really. Jonas touches a peen that doesn’t belong to him and it’s funny and amusing. I do it and it results in a restraining order that forbids me from being within 30 feet of Jake Gyllenhaal and Bear Grylls.

I digress. It’s a good thing that he ditched his purity ring to play slap and tickle with Ashley Greene. Otherwise it might have caught fire right there in the odd naughty parts adorned gift shop.

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