Rihanna Wants a Big One

Honey, who doesn’t? Rihanna flapped her jaw on her “Domestic Abuse is Bad, BUY MY NEW ALBUM” press tour and revealed a little too much.

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In an interview Bravo (German mag, not the network responsible for the greatness of Top Chef), the ‘Russian Roulette’ singer talked about the fact that you must be big enough to ride her love roller-coaster.

“He has to be good in bed and the size matters. You know what I mean? The inner beauty counts as well, but without a toy it doesn’t make it fun. Right now I don’t want to have a serious relationship, I want to have fun. I love flirting at the moment. I’m single and I’m enjoying my freedom. But I don´t give my phone number out that often. But if I’m dating, I check the boy from the top to the bottom.”

Really? Correct me if I am wrong, but didn’t she make sexy times with Shia LaBeouf or at least booty text him? I guess one can’t help but be envious of those shopping in the Tommy Lee section when you are shopping in the Shia LaBeouf half off sale.

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Images Via: WENN.com

Chace Crawford Named Hottest Bachelor and I Demand a Recount

chace-crawford-sucks-bottle

Seriously? This is what we have come to. It’s Jonathon Taylor Thomas 2.0 and he is what we single women have to look forward to? Doomed I tell you…I’m doomed! I might as well shack up with they ambiguously gay couple with the fabulous landscaping and tea cup poodles down the street and give up my search for a man who likes to climb mountains and ride me into the sunset on his horse while agreeing to dress up like a pirate later.

Chace Crawford is a momma’s boy who’s likes to vacation with his little sister, and is admittedly not looking for a GIRLfriend according to People magazine. They named him the hottest bachelor among a sea of hundreds of other men out there. What? Maybe he is the sexiest Pretty, Pretty Princess, but not bachelor. Robert Pattinson and Adam Lambert also made the cut along with Shia LaBeouf, Brody Jenner, Common, Chris Pine, Taylor Kitsch, Ryan Eggold, Kellan Lutz.

Per People:

“On the made-up gay rumors about him and co-star Ed Westwick: “You know what we really did the first time we heard it? Ed goes, ‘Oh, did you hear that rumor about us being gay?’ I was like, ‘Yeah, man.’ He starts laughing and we’re kind of like, ‘Okay, you want to go play pool and have a beer?’ ”

I get that Gossip Girl is hot right now and I am overly picky in my taste in men, but I am wondering if the mag is loosing it. Last year Mario Lopez, cheater extraordinaire, was their hottest bachelor.

Image Via: Hollywood Grind

Shia LaBeouf Groupie Shares Sex Story

I read this and laughed at how ridiculous it sounds. I am pretty sure Shia himself wrote this or paid someone to make this cockamamie story up. I found it hilarious and had to share.

A Shia LaBeouf conquest came forward to share her story on bedding the “Transformers” star. She insists he is the “for a white boy, they dude has some serious SWAGGA.” Her words. Not mine.

Per Back Stage Pazz:

“We went back to his place and talked for awhile. We smoked some weed and drank some beers and he told me about how he broke up with his long time girlfriend, not that I really cared. At the bar we were at a booth and he kept lowly tellin’ me stuff in my ear, like how hot I was and how he wanted me. It was really hot. I had a cheesin’ smile on my face the whole night. We chated [sic] some more then started making out.”

She goes on to detail her night with Shia. If you care to read the nuttery it’s after the cut. Warning, it’s slightly NSFW. Click “Read More…”

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Celebrity Quotes: Shia LaBeouf’s Oedipus Complex

“Probably the sexiest woman I know is my mother. She’s an ethereal angel. Nobody looks like that woman. If I could meet my mother and marry her, I would. I would be with my mother now, if she weren’t my mother, as sick as that sounds.”

-Shia LaBeouf